


but ill never give up you

by brookethenerd



Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: Future Fic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-18
Updated: 2016-12-18
Packaged: 2018-09-09 11:40:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8889379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brookethenerd/pseuds/brookethenerd
Summary: au in which lukas cant sleep without philip there





	

The first night away is the hardest. Philip has a single dorm room, and though it’s tiny, it’s far too empty. He doesn’t have much in the way of keepsakes, save a shoebox of pictures he has sitting on his desk. He plans on pinning them up on the wall at some point, but is too tired after a long day of finding his way around campus that he just leaves them for now.

It’s been 6 months since Lukas got shot, and everything ended. Since Kane was put away. Since Lukas woke up.

Since Lukas not-so-temporarily moved into the bottom bedroom at Helen and Gabe’s.

Bo was promoted, and seeing as his job needed him in the city more often, and that Lukas often woke up screaming if he wasn’t near Philip, he let Lukas move in on the terms that the boys would sleep in separate rooms.

Which, of course, wasn’t very well enforced. With everything that happened, Philip had trouble sleeping, too. When Helen and Gabe woke up to find the two curled up together in one of the bedrooms, they couldn’t bring themselves to keep them apart.

They chase each others demons away. They have since the very beginning. As someone who has demons of her own, Helen didn’t protest in the slightest. She had Gabe; it seemed right that Lukas could have Philip.

Then Philip got a scholarship to a school in the city. For the first year, he had to live in the dorms. Helen and Gabe, and even Lukas, supported this. Philip deserved to have a normal experience. Going to college was one he had earned.

But now the clock is crawling past midnight, and Philip is flat on his back on the tiny twin bed, and he misses the familiar weight of Lukas against him. He misses the way Lukas tucks his head into his neck, warm breath hitting his skin. He misses the shifting he does when he dreams, and the way he sometimes says Philip’s name in his sleep.

He lays there for a long time, the building quiet around him, the room dark. He nearly nods off a few times, but something keeps pulling him back.

Even after all this time, there is still a fear he can’t quite get rid of. Like an itch he can’t scratch.

He knows that it’s over, that Kane is gone, but it’s like his body doesn’t. Part of him is expecting him to punch through the door and pull a trigger, killing Philip the way he almost killed Lukas.

A soft knock at the door cuts through his thoughts, and he sits up, brows pulling together. He swings his feet over the bed, and lets his toes brush the cold floor.

He looks around the dark room for something to be used as a weapon, but quickly realizes that anyone there to hurt him likely wouldn’t knock so tentatively.

He opens the door to find Lukas on the other side, in his pajamas, his hair sticking up in all directions, bags beneath his eyes. His lips part, but no words come out.

“I can’t sleep.” He says after a moment. Philip moves out of the way without a word. Lukas comes in, and Philip shuts the door behind him, leaning against it.

Lukas turns to face him, and takes a few stumbling steps right into Philip’s arms. He buries his face in Philip’s hair, and Philip’s arms come up to wrap around him.

He holds on for a moment before pulling away, and climbing back into bed. He squeezes against the wall, making room for Lukas to lay down next to him. Lukas climbs in, and Philip tugs the covers up over them.

Lukas lifts his head, and Philip wraps an arm around him, pulling Lukas against him, his head on Philip’s chest.

“I see it when I close my eyes.” Lukas says.

“I know.”

“And when you’re not there, I think that somehow, he got to you.”

“I’m okay.” Philip says, hands traveling to Lukas’ hair, running his fingers through it.

Lukas goes quiet for so long that Philip thinks he’s fallen asleep. He fights off sleep, wanting to stay where he is, holding onto Lukas, the two of them alone in the darkness.

He knew that one day the real world was going to catch up to them, and they couldn’t live in the sweet reality they had created. One day they will have to sleep apart. They’ll have to let go of what happened to them, and start to move forward. Philip going to college is the first part of that.

But tonight, he doesn’t want any of that. He just wants to hold the boy he loves, and feel him breathe.

“Are you awake?” Lukas whispers.

Philip murmurs a yes in reply.

“Okay.” He says, content.

“Lukas?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you think about what happens next? Like, what you’re gonna do. What you’re gonna be.” He says.

Lukas shifts, and reaches for Philip’s hand, pulling it up to his chest, playing with Philip’s fingers carefully.

“I dont really care what happens. As long as it’s with you.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“That was really cheesy.” Philip says softly. Lukas’ body shakes with laughter, and he lightly swats Philip’s hand.

“You’re horrible at pillow talk.”

“You think this is pillow talk?”

Lukas groans.

“It’s too late for this shit.” Lukas says. Philip smiles, and bends down, pressing a kiss to Lukas’ head.

“Then go to sleep.”

“Fine.”

“Fine.” Philip mocks. Lukas grumbles, and turns on his side, tossing an arm over Philip’s stomach.

This time, he really does fall asleep. His eyes fall shut, and his lips part, and he starts to snore lightly. Philip smiles, and burrows deeper into the covers, and closer to Lukas.

And this, Philip decides, this is all he really wants. To be with Lukas. Whether it’s in a tiny dorm room or a house. He wants to laugh with him and live with him and love with him.

This, Philip decides, is home.


End file.
